Why Perfectionism is a Trap (and How to Escape It!)
EPISODE 31 / 07.02.2025
Tired of trying to look perfect, be perfect, do perfect? In this episode of DANG!, Todd and Bettijo crack open the myth of perfection—from Hollywood pressure to perfectly curated Instagram squares. They explore what happens when the facade breaks and why letting go of control might be the secret to happiness. Plus, a simple mindset shift that could change how you handle… well, everything.
Podcast Player
Show Notes
In this eye-opening episode of DANG!, Todd and Bettijo dive deep into the pervasive perfection myth that bombards us daily, from perfectly curated social media feeds to the unrealistic expectations in our own lives. Todd shares his unique perspective of growing up under the constant scrutiny of Hollywood, where the pressure to be flawless was immense and often suffocating. He reveals the moment his “perfect facade” cracked, leading to a powerful realization that authenticity trumps manufactured flawlessness.
Bettijo, too, reflects on her own journey with perfectionism, particularly how it manifested in her early blogging days, where she could meticulously control small, cropped “perfect” online images. They explore the idea that perfectionism often stems from a desire for control in chaotic lives and how releasing that need can lead to genuine happiness. The conversation also touches on the shift in media and news consumption, contrasting the “safer” perception of yesteryear with today’s information overload and the rise of opinion as “fact.” They discuss the transformative “Let Them” theory, a powerful concept about focusing on what you can control (yourself) rather than wasting energy trying to influence others.
EPISODE Highlights
- The Pressure to Be Perfect: Todd and Bettijo introduce the concept of the perfection myth and how it infiltrates our lives. (0:45)
- Todd’s Cracking Facade: Todd reveals when his “perfect” Hollywood persona finally gave way to authenticity. (1:35)
- Behind the Scenes of Child Stardom: Todd discusses the unique challenges and lack of boundaries for some child actors. (3:15)
- Overcoming Media Scrutiny: Todd shares how he learned to navigate public mistakes and constant media attention. (6:15)
- Bettijo’s Perfectionism High: Bettijo talks about her battle with perfectionism and how her blogging allowed her to create a façade of perfection. (4:33)
- Perfectionism as a Need for Control: Bettijo connects perfectionism to the desire for control amidst life’s chaos. (5:43)
- The “Let Them” Theory: Bettijo discusses Mel Robbins’ powerful book Let Them, which explores the freedom that comes from letting others be who they are—and reclaiming your energy by focusing on what you can control: yourself. (7:19)
- The Dangers of Controlling Others: Bettijo shares a story about her niece on the roof that shows just how naturally we push back when someone tries to control us—and how those efforts usually backfire. (8:38)
- Shifting Perceptions of Safety: A fascinating discussion on whether the world is truly more dangerous now or if information access has changed our perception. (11:45)
- The Evolution of News and Media: Todd and Bettijo discuss the shift from factual reporting to opinion-driven news. (16:36)
- The Power of Self-Control: Exploring how personal happiness comes from controlling only yourself. (22:27)
- Homeschooling Realities: A humorous look into the daily life of homeschooling parents. (26:32)
- ToddFlix Pick: Todd shares his current must-watch show–Shrinking on Apple TV. (30:20)
ToddFlix Pick
Listen to Learn
- How societal pressures create an unrealistic standard of perfection.
- Why trying to control others is a futile and draining endeavor.
- The personal freedom found in embracing your imperfections.
- How to prioritize your own happiness and well-being without feeling selfish.
Perfection’s overrated. Real life is messy—and that’s where the magic is. Hit play and start living for real.
NOW STREAMING
